Новости за 28.11.2018

Many medical professionals and parents believe that starting school so early in the day has negative consequences for children and families, while others maintain that the school day is fine the way it is. The Onion examines the pros and cons of delaying school start time.

In the wake of the continued sexual assault scandals plaguing the Catholic Church, Pope Francis’ popularity has declined by 20 percent among U.S. Catholics, putting him roughly on par with Pope Benedict. What do you think?

CHICAGO—Expressing their sincere regret for repeating the 2004 incident, representatives for Dave Matthews Band apologized Wednesday after their tour bus dumped another 800 pounds of human shit on the same architecture boat cruise from 14 years ago. “On behalf of Dave and the rest of the crew, I’m here to stress how…

NEW YORK—Offering new insights into what life may have been like for people who left their folkways and cultures behind to begin a new life, a group of American historians unearthed documentation that thousands of immigrants were forced to change their hairstyles upon entering the United States at Ellis Island. “Upon…

WASHINGTON—Confessing they had spent more than $25 million on the endeavor, scientists from the National Communication Association announced Wednesday that they were still decades away from deciphering even the most basic components of their wireless bill. “Man, we’re just at a total loss with this thing,” said Dr.…

WASHINGTON—Expressing self-contempt after learning that former Trump campaign chairman Paul Manafort likely violated the terms of his plea deal, special counsel Robert Mueller reportedly wondered Tuesday what it was about him that makes everyone lie to his face. “It seems like no one ever tells me the truth—what am I…

WASHINGTON—Downplaying reports that his former campaign chairman may have collaborated with the controversial Wikileaks founder in 2016, President Trump said Tuesday that Paul Manafort and Julian Assange did indeed meet on occasion to discuss how collusion was a bad thing they would “never, ever” do. “Sure, they met a…

In a major step forward for the United Kingdom’s exit from the European Union, leaders of the EU approved a plan that gives Britain a 21-month transition period, thus setting up a December approval vote in the British Parliament. What do you think?