Cyberpunk 2077 redemption complete: You can now literally crap yourself to death with an alarmingly well-thought-out mod

Great news: here, at the long end of its redemption arc, Cyberpunk 2077 is finally, totally fixed. Its last remaining flaw has been repaired. The last gap in the edifice has been covered: You can now shit yourself to death.

Apologies for the blue language. That's usually against our style guide, but I feel that Flushing Etiquette, a mod for Cyberpunk 2077 with much more thought put into it than you'd expect, warrants it. In short, it adds the call of nature to Cyberpunk 2077—V now periodically has to visit the little samurai's room or risk consequences. What consequences? See above.

"Either food in NC creates zero waste or V is sporting some kind of chromed up intestine, V can no longer escape nature's call," declares author juiiicy00 This mod adds a new resource meter which you have to manage by visiting the toilet regularly. You could use it alongside Dark Future – Urban Survival Gameplay, which adds needs and addiction mechanics, if you choose. Or you could just freebase the poop mod. Your choice.

"Eat, kill, shit repeat" reads the mod's Core Gameplay overview.

You get a Sims-style bathroom gauge to which you must attend, to put it bluntly. Consumption fills it, using the flush interaction on a lavatory empties it. There are no new animations, thank God.

I admit, I'm writing about this because I'm 12 and think it's kind of funny, but that alone wouldn't be enough. It's also, just, weirdly robust as joke mods go. Yes, yes, eating and drinking fills the bar and bathrooms empty it. But alongside that, cheap food has a chance to give you food poisoning (instant 100% meter), your visits to the bathroom can be, uh, rough or smooth. A good visit? Buffs. A bad one? Pain. Which kind you get is determined by a diceroll.

Oh, and yes, the pièce de résistance: "When your meter hits 100%, your screen starts flashing and a timer begins. If you don't find a usable toilet before the timer runs out V violently shits their pants dying from embarrassment. No really… you will flatline."

Modding is an art.