When I try to talk to my partner about our relationship, he runs away

DEAR DEIDRE: WHEN I try to talk to my partner about any issues I have, his response is to run away. It’s almost as if he would prefer to split up than face up to problems. He closes me down immediately and accuses me of trying to control him but that’s the last thing I […]

DEAR DEIDRE: WHEN I try to talk to my partner about any issues I have, his response is to run away.

It’s almost as if he would prefer to split up than face up to problems.

Alamy

He closes me down immediately and accuses me of trying to control him but that’s the last thing I want to do.

Everything is great in our relationship but sometimes I want to talk about little changes or our future.

He is 43 and I’m 45. I’d never be brutal but I want to be able to tell him things are good or bad.

DEIDRE SAYS: He has obviously suffered from hurt in previous relationships, so problems make his self-defence mechanism kick in.

Rather than telling him you want to talk and making it sound so serious, open the conversation by asking him about his feelings first.

You will then have the chance to put across your view. My e-leaflet on Hiding His Feelings explains more.

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